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Bronze Rat
Home     Index    Lawyer Jokes Index

A tourist wanders into a back-alley shop in San Francisco's Chinatown. Sorting through the objects on display, he discovers a life-sized bronze sculpture of a rat. He picks it up and asks the shop owner the cost.

"Twelve dollars," says the owner, "and a thousand dollars for the story behind it."

"You can keep the story," he replies, "but I'll take the rat."

The tourist leaves the store with the bronze rat under his arm. As he crosses the street, two live rats emerge from a sewer drain and fall into step behind him. Nervously looking over his shoulder, he walks faster, but every time he passes another drain, more rats come and join the parade. Soon, at least a hundred rats are on his tail, and people begin to point and shout. He walks even faster, breaking into a trot as rats swarm from sewers, basements, vacant lots and abandoned cars.

Rats by the thousands are now at his heels, and as he sees the waterfront at the bottom of the hill, he panics and starts to run. But, the rats keep up, squealing hideously, and by the time he reaches the water's edge, he is leading a trail of rats, 12 city blocks long. Making a mighty leap, he jumps up onto a light post and hurls the bronze rat into San Francisco Bay as far as he can heave it. Cleaving to the post, he watches in amazement as the seething tide of rats surges over the breakwater into the sea where they drown. Shaken and mumbling, he makes his way back to the antique shop.

"Ah, you've come back for the rest of the story," says the owner.

"No," says the tourist. "I was wondering if you have a bronze lawyer."
 

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