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Nutty
Warning Labels
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- Beware! To touch these wires is instant death. Anyone
found doing so will be prosecuted. --- Sign at Railroad
Station
* - Cannot be made non-poisonous. --- Windshield Wash Fluid
* - Caution: Do not use this hammer to strike any solid
object. --- Hammer
* - Caution: Hot beverages are hot! --- Coffee Cup
* - Caution: Never drive with the cover on your windshield
--- Automobile Windshield cover:
* - Caution: The contents of this bottle should not be fed
to fish --- Dog Shampoo
* - Choking hazard: This toy is a small ball. --- Rubber
Ball
* - Directions: Use like regular soap --- Dial soap
* - Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or
genitals. --- Swedish chain saw
* - Do not dangle the mouse by its cable or throw the mouse
at co-workers. --- SGI computer
* - Do not drive car or operate machinery. --- Children's
cough medicine
* - Do not eat toner. --- Laser Printer Cartridge
* - Do not eat urinal cakes. --- Rest Stop in Wisconsin
* - Do not light the flame near the face. --- Cigarette
Lighter
* - Do not look into laser with remaining eye. --- Laser
Pointer
* - Do not pour liquids into your television set. ---
Television Owner’s Manual
* - Do not put lit candles on phone. --- Cordless Phone
* - Do not recharge, put in backwards, or use. --- Battery
* - Do not turn upside down. (printed on bottom of the box)
--- Tesco's Tiramisu dessert
* - Do not use for drying pets. --- Microwave Oven
* - Do not use intimately. --- Deodorant
* - Do not use orally after using rectally. --- Electronic
Thermometer
* - Do not use orally. --- Toilet Bowl Cleaning Brush
* - Fits one head. --- Hotel Shower Cap
* - For external use only! --- Curling Iron
* - For indoor or outdoor use only. --- Christmas lights
* - For lifting purposes only --- Car Jack
* - If swallowed or lodged in ear or nose see doctor. ---
Ray-O-Vac Renewal AA Batteries
* - If you are seated in an exit aisle and are unable to
read this, please ask a stewardess to reseat you. --- Cayman
Airlines safety booklet
* - Instructional video on hooking up your VCR included. ---
VCR
* - Keep out of children. --- Korean Kitchen Knives
* - Not dishwasher safe. --- TV Remote Control
* - Not for human consumption. --- Package of Dice
* - Not for weight control. --- Breath Savers
* - Not to be used as a personal flotation device. --- 6x10
inch inflatable picture frame
* - Not to be used as protection from a tornado. --- blanket
from Taiwan
* - Not to be used for the other use. --- Japanese food
processor
* - Open packet and eat contents. --- Pack of Peanuts
* - PARENT: Please exercise caution—mask and chest plate
are not protective; cape does not enable wearer to fly. ***
Bat Man The Animated Series Armor Set
* - Peel fruit from cellophane before eating. --- Fruit
Roll-ups
* - Please store in the cold section of the refrigerator.
--- Grapes
* - Product will be hot after heating. *** Marks &
Spencer Bread Pudding
* - Remember: Objects in mirror are actually behind you. ---
Bike Helmet Mirror
* - Remove used tampon before inserting a new one. ---
Tampax Tampons
* - Serving suggestion: Defrost. --- Swann frozen dinners
* - Theft of this container is a crime. --- Milk Crate
* - There shall be three (3) access levels with level 4
being the highest level. --- Fire Alarm System
* - This camera only works when there is film inside. ---
Camera
* - This cape does not give the wearer the ability to fly.
--- Halloween Superman Costume
* - THIS PRODUCT NOT TESTED ON ANIMALS. --- Insect Spray
from New Zealand
* - Twist top off with hands. Throw top away. Do not put top
in mouth. --- Soft Drink
* - Use caution when using near fire, flame, or sparks. ---
Fireplace Lighter
* - USE EXTREME CAUTION when stretching cord over load. Keep
face and other vulnerable body parts away from potential
cord rebound path. -- Bungee cord
* - USE REPEATEDLY FOR SEVERE DAMAGE. --- Taiwanese shampoo
* - Warning - this spray is harmful to bees --- Insect Spray
* - Warning! Never iron clothes on the body. --- Rowenta
Iron
* - Warning: contains nuts --- Sainsbury's Peanuts
* - Warning: do not use if you have prostate problems. ---
Midol PMS
* - Warning: Do not use in shower. Never use while sleeping.
--- Conair Pro Style 1600 hair dryer
* - Warning: Do not use on eyes. --- Heated Seat Cushion
* - Warning: drug may cause sleepiness. --- Sleeping Pill
Prescription
* - Warning: Flame may cause fire. --- Butane Lighter
* - Warning: has been found to cause cancer in laboratory
mice. --- Rat Poison
* - Warning: knives are sharp! --- Sharpening Stone
* - Warning: may cause drowsiness. --- Nytol
* - Warning: May contain small parts. --- Frisbee
* - WARNING: Not for use as earplugs. --- Silly Putty
* - Warning: Pastry Filling May Be Hot When Heated. ---
Pop-Tarts
* - Warning: Remove child before folding baby stroller. ---
Baby Stroller
* - Warning: This product can burn eyes --- Curling Iron
* - You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details
inside. --- Fritos |
